where

it's just a place,
between the past and future.
one day we'll be able to move beyond it,
not in the cliche death way, together, yes,
we'll arrive in some other place and say,
'oh, wow, so this is where we were going.'


i carelessly lost god and i blame the catholic church

intergalactic

with so much space
there is a rumor going around
that matter does not have mass
it attracts it, no kind of air or ether required
and the thin energy
off dreaming somewhere else

glass is fluid

i left
my overcoat behind
plush-colored or khaki
whichever i would have chosen
had i remembered
that it’s starting to get cold
again.


my
fingers slightly swollen
i walked on admiring the new fashions of coating
wondering how long
i had left to be without
cover
still, to strangers and friends
indisputably sane

i think there might be aliens. and i'm sure they're more stable than these humans running around.

toys

when i was little i used to smash my toys against the wall, when i was upset.

eventually all my toys were broken.

when i get upset now, i just get smashed.

how not to save your life..................

two shots in the arm
i am bleeding from the left and i can't breathe in here.
let my blood flow free, release it from those little plastic bottles in your hand.
release me from the squares on my fingertips, i have no affinty for this life.

are my longings realistic or are they just the wishful thinking ?
aflower child longing to break free?
i never wanted this.Never.

i told all of you many times and yet, there was the pressure.
i have succombed and now i am left to roll over and over
in sharp objects and pretend it doesn't hurt.

patchquilts

it's like coming in from a cold windy day an sitting in front of the fireplace with foggy glasses, and it's like running through the park on the first day of summer laughing and pretending to be a caveman. it's really like yellow flannel pajamas just warm out of the dryer. it's patchquilts and suede pants, and sleeping with a baby puppy the first night you get it. it's like opening a brand new pink floyd album, wearing new coat on the first day of winter to the school. it's like seeing a best friend for the first time in three months and not saying a word for at least five minutes, just grinning. it's like finishing your third beer at the beach and noticing your nose is sunburned. it's like going to a party with a bald head wearing red tennis shoes and an itchy foot moose tee shirt and asking the ugliest, plimply girl to dance and she's a really good dancer. it's like giving a bum a brand new pack of cigarettes when he asks for just one. it's like throwing a touchdown pass in a football game and listening to the people cheer. it's like doing your last length before putting on your medallion while your butt still hurts. it's listening to simon and garfunkel and crying from happyiness. it's patchquilts.

NOW

every morning i awake in iceland, and securely take hold of my thrown. as the new reigning king of the land of exhaustion, i trudge through the day, scorching the rude dirty monkeys with fire from my eyes as they attempt to dance on my nerves and toy with the little patience i still have remaining. i end the day with a magical vitamin that should be enhancing my body, but which really upsets and binds. so i drift off to sleep, only to be awakened, oh so often, by the distant call of streaming yellow waterfalls. the riches of my kingdom will not be reaped for many months, and until then i will endure the life of living in iceland, exhaustion so i will be blessed with a beautiful, new life.

for such a beautiful place, it sure can be cruel. for such a cruel place, it sure can be spectacular

dear them,

i am writing to you to let you know that it is ok to get upset about things. you don't always have to wake up and put a smile on your face. you don't have to find the light at the end of the tunnel. sometimes there is no light. you are only fooling yourself into believing that everything is alright. you may be fooling others as well, but what good does it do you. it only makes you have to act that much more the next day.

just stop fuckin' lieing to yourself and realize that you are not a happy person. you hold it all in and you put on this facade for the world, but if you don't believe it eventually nobody else will and they will all know how phony you are.

there, self, doesn't it feel better to let that out!

life can really suck sometimes, embrace it. don't deny it.

maybe it won't get any better than this.......