how long has it been since i misspelled words and blamed alcohol?
quite long. so here it is droogies, your narrator makes lots of clever references and stupid mistakes and blames it all on his very good friend, Mr Ethyl Alcohol. "pateince, m'dear", poodi says.
"remember, what we say shall be discovered by archaeologists (if is spelled this word right, its purely thanks to chance) in 2350 AD who shall read our blog and come to dramatic concl;usions about the human race".
example - "human beings are like giant tectonic plates. they rub against each other for a while, get really testy and then post really angry writeups about how they are right. about everything".
no, giant tectonic plates do not do that. they rub against each other and release giant killer waves that fuck everyones' happinesss and their vacations. pardon the poor taste in humor.
so how long has it been since i stumbled out of Mukambika Paradise "the family garden restaurnat"? (i'll be damned if i get my family into this dump).
how long has it been since i joined the groin-scratching, nose digging yokels of khatta land?
how long since i wrote something "personal" and "tangled up"?
since i read e-books and wished i could write like their authors?
how long since i stopped working on "Magic's Farm"?
some Pritchett wisdom : do you feel like you have the life expectancy of a glass cymbal? (if you didn't laugh for five minutes at this with much wiping of streaming tears and cramping of stomach, consider yourself to have a sense of humor (or lack of) rivalled only by Herr Hitler). well, if you do, (life expectancy of glass cymbal, remember? it would have been so easy to have passed this off as my own but plesase give me lots of points for quoting my sources), please start up on your blog.
and write now.
tally ho folks, i should indulge in more "creative writing". (every time i hear that phrase my balls shrivel up). or maybe i shouldn't. Hic!!!
'He's A Jolly Good Fellow' on infinite repeat.
No comments:
Post a Comment